


Darling, You're The One I Want

by orphan_account



Category: Victorious (TV)
Genre: Anyways, F/M, Goes over various moments in their relationship, It's canon if you want it to be, Recollection of memories, Stangers to Friends to Lovers, based on the song paper rings, can be conisdered loosely canon, cause i do, cute and in love, hope you like it, i hope it makes sense, i recommend, if it doesnt oops, ill let you read now, it's long im sorry, kinda slow burn? maybe?, little angst but not really, now im nervous, paper rings by taylor swift, the timeline is a bit out of control im sorry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-07
Updated: 2020-12-07
Packaged: 2021-03-10 05:28:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 17,805
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27929026
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: A recollection of moments in Beck and Jade's relationship as told by lyrics of the song Paper Rings
Relationships: Beck Oliver/Jade West
Comments: 1
Kudos: 23





	Darling, You're The One I Want

**Author's Note:**

> Hi Hi! I feel like I haven't posted in forever and that makes me feel really shitty, so i'm sorry!! But I'm back with something new, it's kind of an experiment. I haven't really written anything like this before so im excited. It took way longer than it should've, it was supposed to be done over a week ago. But life's been complicated recently, so here it is now, oh well :) Anyways, this is basically just a bunch of memories between Beck and Jade told by the lyrics of Paper Rings. It's a great song, so i totally suggest listening to it while reading ;) Anyways, i'll let you read now, I hope you enjoy <3

**_“The moon is high like your friends were the night that we first met”_ **

_ They both knew of each other _ . They went to the same school, were in the same grade, and had classes together, so it was hard  _ not  _ to know who the other was.

And it’s not like they didn’t take notice of each other either.  _ They did _ . They were too standout not to be noticeable. They would watch each other in the hallway or while in class without even realizing. Something about the other was just so alluring to them.

He had become the _ it guy _ less than three weeks into freshman year, girls were all over him constantly. He kept his composure relaxed and calm and it seemed to draw people towards him. He’d made friends and become popular in no time flat. She noticed how social he was,  _ something she never wanted to be _ . He would start up a conversation with anyone around him and never seemed to get angry. She couldn’t tell if it was all a facade or if he was  _ actually _ like that. But the way everyone gravitated towards him made her annoyed for some reason. Maybe it’s because she could tell they were total opposites without even talking to each other. Or maybe it was because the one person he never seemed to gravitate towards  _ was her _ . Whatever it was, it gave her enough reason to avoid him. _ So that’s what she did.  _

_ She was unique. _ All you had to do was look at her and you could tell something in her was different. Her appearance didn’t make it hard to tell just how distinct of a person she was either. Her long flowy hair, often mixed with various colored streaks, matched the dark clothes she’d wear. Her face was usually sketched with a scowl or a smirk and she wasn’t sociable or friendly. It was like she didn’t care who she was friends with, _ like she’d rather be alone _ . The person he saw her with the most was the clingy, little redhead he knew as Cat. He didn’t understand their friendship dynamic, they both seemed so different to each other. But he knew even if he didn’t understand the dynamic, it somehow worked. If you saw one of them, chances were, you’d see the other not too far away. 

Her friendship with Cat was how she ended up at the party in the first place. The last thing she wanted to do was spend her Friday night at some lame party with a bunch of gross, hormonal teenagers, but Cat had begged her to come. She insisted going to the party was something _ they had to do _ .

She was convinced attending a party was what would make their highschool experience memorable _. Like they were some kind of teenage movie cliche.  _ No matter how many times Jade reminded her that they were only freshmen and that there’d be more parties, Cat demanded they go to this one. And if Jade was being honest, she found the entire argument stupid, but Cat wouldn’t stop begging her.  _ So here they were.  _

Actually,  _ here Jade was. _ Cat had ventured off a few hours earlier to go dance and do karaoke with people. She had gone by herself, because socializing and dancing and having fun wasn’t Jade’s thing.  _ Everyone knew that. _

Jade  _ instead _ took it upon herself to watch Cat socialize from the corner of the room. She had a bottle of some cheap, knockoff wine she’d found in one hand and her phone in the other. Those were the two things she really needed for the night, and as long as she could keep an eye on Cat, she was content. 

She noticed he was there right when they entered the party. He’d been playing beer pong with Andre from their theatre class and some other guy she didn’t recognize. They’d made eye contact for a split second before Cat pulled her away and for the rest of the night, they avoided each other. She’d seen him dance with Cat a few hours earlier, and when Cat tried to get her to dance with them, she said no repeatedly. Her streak of avoiding him at every chance she got was going well so far, and dancing with him and Cat was not about to break that. Watching him from the opposite side of the room was a position she’d much rather be in. 

It wasn’t until now that she’d lost sight of him. He was probably off in a different room with friends, but for some reason, Jade felt herself wanting him to come back into her line of sight. Her night had been boring and uneventful, so watching him was a way to keep herself enteratined.

He’d been gone for around twenty minutes now and her bottle of wine was beginning to taste bad. She looked over one last time to see Cat dancing with girls from another school before allowing herself to move towards the kitchen. She felt a little bit tipsy from the wine so instead of walking into the kitchen, she found herself stumbling messily. She pulled open various cabinets in the kitchen in hopes of finding more alcohol, but every bottle was either close to being empty or entirely gone.

She finally found one cabinet above the fridge that was stocked with drinks and yanked it open. Seeing into the cabinet was a struggle due to how high up it was, so she ended up standing on her toes. Her head was buried so deep into the cabinet she didn’t even notice him come into the kitchen. Once she found a bottle that wasn’t close to empty and didn’t reek of expiration, she pulled herself out of the cabinet and turned around. She wasn’t expecting him to be right behind her, so when she saw him, she jolted and almost dropped the bottle she was holding.

He was leaning against the sink, arms crossed in front of him,  _ watching her. _ He smirked as she flinched and almost let go of the bottle, trying not to smile when she gave him a harsh glare.

“Hey” he started off.

“Jesus, you shouldn’t scare people like that” she scowled, watching him bite back a laugh. 

“Sorry, I just wasn’t expecting you to be here, you don’t really seem like the party type” he stood up straighter against the counter, uncrossing his arms. 

“Yeah, _ I’m not _ . I’m only here because of Cat” she shrugged, bringing the bottle up to her mouth. She took a swift drink before talking again, “Well if you’ll excuse me, this party’s lame and I’m bored so…” she dragged out her sentence “I’m off to go get wasted... _ alone. _ ”

She shut the cabinet doors before turning to leave the kitchen, stopping when she felt something holding her back. She looked over her shoulder to see him holding her elbow, stopping her from leaving.

“Wait, I’m bored too” he didn’t let go of her elbow, watching as she glanced him up and down. “How about we split that?” he gestured to the bottle in her hands. 

“You’re bored?” she almost laughed, but held herself back. “How are you bored? What about your friends? What happened to them?”

“They went to go get high off of some weird shit and I’m not really into that” he shrugged, taking the bottle out of her hands, “so come on, let’s go.”

“You know we’re not friends, right? I don’t even know you” she narrowed her eyes at him, taking the bottle back. 

“Well I know you, I’ve seen you at school. We can just consider this our first real meeting. Here I’ll start” he took a deep breath.  _ “Hi, I’m Beck.” _

“Okay this is weird” she winced before saying  _ “I’m Jade.” _

They shook hands, their eyes locking for a split second. They both smiled lightly and as Jade tried to pull her hand back, he kept his grip on it. 

“If we’re splitting that bottle, we shouldn’t be stuck in this crappy kitchen” he tugged on her hand and before she could even argue, he was pulling her towards the living room.

As they walked, they passed his friends, _ clearly high as hell _ , sitting on the couch. Well, they were  _ sort of _ sitting, more like laughing hysterically while chaotically falling all over each other. 

“Wow, they’re sloppy” she raised her eyebrows as they watched Andre fall off the couch, still laughing. 

“Yeah, you’re telling me” Beck rolled his eyes playfully, continuing to pull her through the house. 

“I can’t really judge, considering my friend is doing  _ that _ ” Jade winced, gesturing to Cat, who was shouting into a microphone while spinning around the living room. 

They cringed at their friends for a few more seconds before Beck started to pull her away again. When he finally got them to where he wanted, he let go of her hand. Jade looked over his shoulder, seeing the glass door leading out to the deck. 

“Isn’t it like freezing cold outside?” she questioned as he pulled open the door. 

“It’s September in Los Angeles” he chuckled “I think we’ll be alright.”

He pushed the door all the way open, letting her go outside first. She saw nobody was out there and sighed. She moved to the side and slid down the wall, sitting on the deck floor, bringing the bottle up to her mouth. 

He smiled as he saw her sitting, joining her on the ground. She passed him the bottle, bringing her knees up to her chest.

“Why do you suddenly want to talk to me?” she asked, resting her cheek against her knee so she was looking at him. 

“I’ve always wanted to talk to you, you just seem to avoid me most of the time.”

She sighed, looking away from his eyes so she was looking out at the dark sky instead.

“Why do you try to avoid me?” he asked, turning his eyes away from the side of her face so he was looking at the sky like she was. 

“I don’t know really, I think it’s just because we’re so different from each other I wouldn’t even know how to talk to you.”

“You’re talking to me right now though” he smirked, watching as she rolled her eyes. 

“Yeah,  _ no shit _ . It’s easier when it’s just the two of us. But at school, it’s different” she sighed, resting her chin on her knees. 

“How is it different?”

“At school, you’re always with people, always smiling and laughing.  _ And I hate that, _ I hate being surrounded by people all the time.”

“Maybe it should be _ just the two of us  _ more often then” he smiled smugly, nudging his shoulder against hers. 

“God you’re so dumb” she raised her eyebrows while looking down at the ground. She brought the bottle up to her lips and Beck knew it was because she was trying to cover her smile. 

She set the bottle down after she was done drinking and laid on the ground next to it. Her eyes focused on the stars above them and she sighed. He faintly smiled as he saw her lay down, moving the bottle over so he could lay next to her. 

The air between them stayed quiet for a while, all they could hear was the vague noise of crickets from somewhere around them. It felt like a blanket of tranquility had been set down as everything went still. _ Like they were the only two people in the world at that moment. _

He was the one to break the silence first, moving his head so he was no longer looking at the sky, instead looking at the side of her face. 

“Tell me something” he whispered.

“Anything?” she asked back, turning her head so they both faced each other, eyes locking. 

“Yeah, anything.”

“Alright, I hate Valentine’s day” she bit her lip, folding her arms in front of her, setting them on her stomach. 

“Why?”

“I just think it’s dumb. Why do we have one day designated to show people how much we love them when we should be doing that all year? What good does it do to shower people with love for one day if you’re not showing them how much you care every other day? It all just feels like one big marketing ploy to get people to waste money on chocolates and flowers” she rambled honestly. 

When she finished talking, they sat in silence for a couple of seconds. Both of them not expecting her to be so openly honest. It certainly wasn’t like her, and when she felt herself continue to talk, it was as if something shifted inside her. Like there was something about him that just made her want to tell him everything she’d ever felt.

Maybe it’s the way he listened and never stopped her once when she was talking, like he was taking everything in as she said it.  _ Like he actually cared.  _

That was always a big thing for her. She only wanted to talk to people that actually cared. Why waste your breath saying anything if the person you're talking to doesn’t care? It’s something she experienced with her parents a lot, and people at school. She would say something and nobody would be interested. The only person she felt actually listened to her was Cat. __

_ Until now.  _

And even if she was saying the most random shit, she could tell he actually cared. And something about the way he cared made her feel warm inside. It might’ve been the alcohol starting to get to her, but she was pretty positive it was him. 

“Your turn to tell me something” she whispered.   


“Okay....I think it’s terrifying how every small decision we make can later impact our entire life. I mean, one thing can happen and it’ll change everything we’ve ever known. All it takes is one second and then boom.. _.everything’s different _ .” 

She stayed quiet after he finished, processing what he said in the same way he had for her earlier. She kept her eyes up on the stars as she thought over what he said, but he turned to look at her. 

Her eyeliner and mascara were a bit smudged around her eyes, and the curls her hair had been put in were slowly turning into waves. He couldn’t see her eyes that well, but he could tell they were shining underneath the starlight. She was playing with the rings on her fingers as she bit her lip and he could tell she was deep in thought. He didn’t say anything as she continued to think, allowing her to be the one to break the silence this time. 

“What do you mean?”

“Take us for example. I feel like tonight is the start of something new. Like something in the atmosphere’s changed. We finally talked to each other and now all we can do is get to know each other more” he smiled as he finished talking, watching her faint grin start to grow. 

“Guess that means we’re going to have to keep telling each other things” she turned and arched an eyebrow at him, a mischievous smirk toying on her lips. 

_ “I’m pretty sure it’s your turn again.” _

They spent the rest of the night together. Staying outside for most of it, sharing random things that came to mind while pointing out different stars to each other. And as they told each other whatever they could think of, they started to laugh more and more. While the night got darker and the amount of alcohol left in their bottle got smaller, their laughs got louder. By the time their bottle was almost empty, both of them were hysterically laughing on the ground and could barely keep their eyes open. 

They only ventured back inside the house when their bottle ran empty and they wanted more. They noticed people were staring as they traveled through the house, not used to seeing them together. If they were being truthful, they weren’t used to it either. She came to the party determined to avoid him and he wasn’t sure he'd be able to work up the courage to talk to her. But as the night continued, they were happy things hadn’t gone as planned. They were too tipsy to admit it, but they both actually really liked each other. Their feelings were obviously clear by the end of the night when Cat found them back outside again. His flannel had been placed around her shoulders and they were somewhat making out, stopping in between kisses every few seconds to laugh ridiculously. 

Jade had been the one wanting to leave earlier that night, but when Cat caught her with Beck, she refused to go. Cat had to practically rip her away from Beck, telling her repeatedly they both had to go home. Jade refused to listen for a while, but after more pleading from Cat, she complied. And as she waved bye to Beck, she could feel the contentment practically radiate off of her. Like he’d brought out the happiness she’d kept buried inside her for so long.

She obviously wasn’t close to being sober at all, but she desperately wanted to be. She had a feeling she wouldn’t be able to recall any of the night’s memories the next day and if she was telling the truth, that made her sad. She wanted to remember everything that happened, she wanted to remember how she felt in this exact moment. She wanted the moments to keep replaying in her mind to the point where she could feel the happiness seeping out of her.

Later that night, after her and Cat had tried to sober themselves down in hopes of lessening their hangovers the next day, Jade found herself struggling to recall everything that happened. She knew the feeling was still there, the excitement and happiness were still bubbling in her heart, but the moments were drifting away from her head. And the last thing she remembers thinking before falling asleep was  _ please don’t let anything that happened tonight be a dream.  _

**_“Went home and tried to stalk you on the internet”_ **

After Jade left, Beck tried his best to sober up. Just like her, he wanted to remember the night’s events to the best of his ability. He wanted to remember every moment he had with her and knew he wouldn’t be able to do that if he stayed drunk. 

So, before leaving the party, he chugged a few coffees and tried to eat something. After saying bye to Andre,  _ who was still high _ , he began to walk home. And as he felt the light breeze of the Los Angeles air, he replayed every moment with her in his head. 

Some of it was fading from his memory already, but at the same time, many details stood out. He could remember how her long hair was curled and how it blew in the wind softly. He could still see her smile in his head, how it would grow bigger every time he made her laugh. He could feel her manicured nails against his knuckles, like their hands were still conjoined. 

He felt like he was on cloud nine, like everything that happened was all a part of a dream he never wanted to wake up from. He knew anyone sober would call him crazy, but he was pretty sure he was falling in love. 

It could've been the alcohol making him feel this way, making all of these emotions pour out of him at once, causing his mind to fog up. But he was pretty positive the feeling was real. The alcohol was just intensifying it. 

At least in this moment in time, he knew he was falling in love with her. Maybe the next day the feeling would fade and he would realize how crazy he sounded, but right now, he felt like he was in love.  _ Real love.  _

He knew he had to keep the feeling to himself, he couldn’t tell anyone he’d fallen in love with a girl after spending only one night drinking and talking together, they’d call him insane. _ Because that was insane. _ And ridiculous. And kind of stupid if he thought about it. He had no idea if she felt the same way, but here he was, falling in love after one night. 

He had no way of knowing what she felt, but even if the smallest bit of her felt the same way he did, _ he’d take it. _ He’d take it even if it was just the tip of her pinky reciprocating his feelings. 

Because as he entered his house and went up the stairs to his room, she was the only thing taking up space in his mind. 

He found himself desperately wanting to know more about her. He hadn't gotten her number, both of them were too out of it to even think about sharing contact information. But he knew her name, and that was enough.

He grabbed his laptop before sitting down on his bed, opening the computer in hopes of discovering just a glimpse more of her. 

He went to the slap page first, typing in her name.  _ Jade West.  _ Her account came up immediately, him not wasting a second clicking on it. 

It was exactly as he pictured it in his head. It was just like she’d been tonight,  _ passionate and truthful _ . There were pictures of her by herself or sometimes with Cat. In most of them she was dressed the same way she’d been tonight, dark clothes and long wavy hair. There was a link to her music account that had all of her playlists and there was a section with no pictures, just casual posts. They were mostly random thoughts of hers, talking about aimless subjects, just like they had been earlier that night. 

He was on her page for at least twenty minutes, it felt like he was learning everything about her in the easiest way. He doesn’t know why he didn’t just go on her page earlier to find out more about her. In the amount of time he’d been on her page, he’d found out her favorite color was blue, her parents were divorced, she had younger twin siblings named Juliette and Jeremy, and she loved butterflies.

As the early hours of the morning approached, he was still reading her posts and looking at her pictures. He finally decided to try to get some sleep around 4am, but before allowing his eyes to close, he made sure to hit the follow button for her account. 

**_“Now I’ve read all the books besides your bed”_ **

She was a bigger reader than he was. She loved the feeling of disappearing into a different world. Letting reality fade away as the setting of the book took up her mind. He’d tease her for being obsessed with reading, but he wasn’t much different. He was a bookworm just as much as she was, except their tastes were entirely different.

He loved any of the classics, he’d read anything coming from a well known author. He was pretty sure his taste in books came from him being a hopeless romantic. Anything with a good, tragic, romantic storyline... he’d read. He loved reading feelings and emotions, letting them overtake his mind. Something about reading about other people’s emotions evoked his own, like he could feel the emotions physically spill out of him every time he read something of the heart. 

She was the opposite. She liked anything mysterious, psychological. She wanted to know people’s thoughts, not their feelings. She wanted to see how each person’s thought process worked and how they dealt with experiences. She loved poetry because she felt it was a way to see into people’s minds. Like reading poetry was somehow reading into their soul. She didn’t care if the author was well known or completely random, she would read anything she could find in a bookstore, long as it had meaning.

Even with her sway towards books surrounding mystery and depth, she still found herself reading all the books he read. It wasn’t her style at all, but whenever she was bored in his RV, she’d pick up one of his books and start reading it. He had a large variety of books taking up all the space in his room, but his favorites were always stacked up on his nightstand by his bed. 

Those were the ones she’s read the most. Mainly so she could talk to him about them, _ but still. _ She would never tell anyone this, but talking about books with him was one of her favorite things. She loved how he would get passionate about the books he loved and would get excited every time she liked one he liked. 

She thought he was a total dork for loving Shakespeare, and when she told him how she thought Romeo and Juliet wasn’t all that, he’d practically lost his shit. But it was nothing compared to how excited he got when he found out she liked Pride and Prejudice. It was one of the first books she read from his rv. She read it just a few months after that night at the party. He’d been working on homework when she picked it up, and before she even realized it, she had finished the book. They spent dinner that night talking about the book, and if she was being honest, it was one of her favorite memories with him. 

It amazed her how happy she’d get from little things like that. She’d never been one to get overly happy or excited by a small detail, she’d rather look at the big picture.

But with him, she felt herself getting happy over everything they did. They could spend two hours at dinner talking about a book, and she’d be content for the rest of the week. 

She liked to keep track of all the books of his she’d read. She kept a list on her phone of all the ones she's finished already, the ones she was currently reading, and the ones she had yet to read. Looking at how long the list had gotten as time went on made her think of how far they’d come. As the list continued to grow, they grew as people too. Discovering new things about themselves, each other, and their relationship like they were uncovering chapters of a book. 

The list reminded her of every moment they’d spent together in peace. How they would spend hours reading together as if the world had gone quiet and they were the only two people that mattered. 

Moments like those were the ones she always found herself craving. Times where he’d be focused working on a script and she would just lay and read. Her head would rest in his lap while his fingers ran through her hair. The silence would be overcoming as she read and he worked, but it was what they both needed. 

The serenity was what they needed. They needed moments like these like they needed air. Moments where nothing could stop them from getting lost in their own little world. 

**_“The wine is cold like the shoulder that I gave you in the street. Cat and mouse for a month, or two, or three.”_ **

They both ended up being right. Waking up the next day after the party, they could barely remember anything. They remember being together outside and talking, but thinking of what their topics of conversation had been was hard. Like everything they said was all a blurry memory taking up space in the back of their heads. And if the blurry memories weren’t enough, along with the pounding headaches from their hangovers, their feelings towards the previous night were hard to understand. 

Jade woke up the next day remembering how she spurred out whatever came to mind the night before, and she felt embarrassed. 

She usually wasn’t like that, she typically kept to herself. She wouldn’t let people see inside her mind like that in fear of them rejecting her. Her thoughts were something she kept locked up in her head, not wanting others to invade something so personal. 

But she let him inside, she told him things she hadn’t told anyone before, not even Cat. And now it was all coming back to her, like karma.  _ And karma was proving to be a serious bitch. _

She’d told him personal things, her private thoughts and feelings, and he probably still remembered them. She didn’t think she'd be able to face him again after saying everything she had. 

So, as Cat made them coffee that morning, she thought over all the ways she could avoid him. Her mind was telling her,  _ more like screaming at her _ , to pretend the night before didn't exist. He knew things now.  _ Secrets.  _

And he now carried the ability to tell anyone those secrets. Her mind was yelling for her to protect herself. Shield herself from him in hopes that he wouldn’t share anything she told him with other people. 

But while her mind was insisting avoidance, her heart encouraged trust. A tiny part of her wanted to trust him, after all he shared things with her too. She had access to his secrets just like he had access to hers. And sure, she couldn’t remember all of them,  _ stupid alchohol,  _ but she could recall some. And as long as he kept a tight hold on her secrets, she’d keep his to herself too. 

But when it came down to it, she ended up siding with her mind over her heart. She knew a small part of her was going to long being back with him. But the final line was protecting herself. And she knew better than to trust people after just one night. So avoiding him was how it was going to be. 

He woke up the next morning feeling the opposite. He didn’t want to avoid her, instead, he wanted to be closer to her. To know her more and more, to the point where there would be no mystery left between them. 

His severe headache made it hard for him to think, but he did anyway. The entire morning he stayed wrapped up in his own mind. He went over every moment they’d been together just like he had earlier. The memories were more vague now, less visible in his brain, but still present. He remembered what they both shared with each other, everything they said. It was all deep, and meaningful, and he felt like it was one of the most impactful conversations he’d had with anyone in a while. 

He struggled to think of everything she told him, but he could bring to mind the way she spoke. She spoke with such assurance and depth, like everything she said she truly meant. As if she’d been building up her thoughts for years now and she finally got to let them all out with him. Even with the auntehnicty and profundity that her voice carried, it was still calming. She said what she wanted with meaning, but also with great gentleness.

Like the air between them was a fragile state. And if her voice got too strong, it would all come crashing down. 

He could tell they connected right away. And the connection wasn’t rudimentary or average, it was immeasurable and intense. They spent the night sharing thoughts and secrets, and now they were bound together somehow. 

If she opened up to him that freely after only knowing each other for a few minutes, imagine how much more she’d share if they spent more time together. He longed for that, he longed to have her next to him like he did just a few short hours ago. But she avoided him before, and while he wasn’t fully sure, he had a feeling she’d go back to that habit. 

_ Hell _ , maybe she didn’t even remember what had gone down the night before, they were both so drunk to the point where it was hard to stand. He didn’t blame her if she couldn’t remember anything, he was struggling to do so himself. 

That’s why he made it his goal to be alone with her again, to attempt to recreate the simplacy they had the night prior. She’d probably be hesitant, after all they weren’t friends and had only spoken for one night.

But he knew even if her feelings may not be as intense as his, they still had to be there. It may have been the alcohol causing her to spill everything she felt in front of him, but he knew another part of it was that she felt comfortable being beside him. Trust was something they had to work their way up to, but comfort was already existent. 

She could shut him down in a matter of seconds if she truly wanted to, but he had hope that his feelings were reciprocated. He just had to figure out a way to get her to express them without fear or uneasiness. 

So as the weekend passed and he got to school the following Monday, he did his best to attempt talking to her. Even being in the same vicinity as her was enough.  _ But she was avoiding him.  _

And not avoiding him like he expected. _ No, _ she was going to greater lengths to steer clear of him than she had been before. 

_ Before, _ she avoided him casually, like they just never got the chance to talk. 

_ But now, _ she was doing everything in her power to make sure she wasn’t near him. She would flee if he tried to get close to her and if he even tried to get a second alone with her to talk, she’d make a run for it. 

Cat had become somewhat of a shield for her. Like a guard she used to make sure he couldn't make her his center of attention. If he ever approached them, she made sure Cat was the main focus of the conversation. And when her and Beck weren’t paying attention, Jade would disappear. 

She didn’t want it to be this way. She wanted to be close to him in the same way he wanted to be close to her. But in her head, she knew she couldn’t let that happen.  _ No, _ she refused to let her heart get stomped on again. And if she stopped staying away from, she might end up doing something she would regret. 

She was falling for him just like he had for her. She’d been falling for him since that night, and the way he was so persistent in getting her just made her love him even more. _ But she knew. _ She knew to keep her walls up at all times. Because eventually she’d stop falling, and when she stopped falling, she’d much rather still have her heart intact.

Falling in love was dangerous, it’s setting yourself up for heartache. She knew that all too well. She recognized that she plummeted into love instead of falling into it. And when she crashed into it, she crashed hard.  _ And that fucking hurt. _ So keeping herself away from that hurt was her solution. She’d seen attempts at love crash and burn far too many times, and she couldn’t allow that happen to herself. 

_ Though it wasn’t easy. _ She avoided his presence as much as possible, but she couldn't get away from him every time. There’d be moments where she’d get stuck, and he would try to talk, and her entire plan would end up going down the drain. 

It was as if they were a cat and mouse. He did his best to pursue her no matter what, to get her alone at every chance he had. But she was stubborn, she refused to let herself show her real feelings, refused to let herself truly fall in love. 

Instead of sitting down and figuring things out once and for all, they continued with this pattern. It was a game to them, _ a game they were both determined to win. _

His win would be getting her to stop, convincing her that she could trust him and all he wanted in life was to know her. _ The real her.  _

Her victory would be getting him to finally put his attention on something else. Finally having him understand that she was far too broken and protective of her heart to be with him.

Neither of their victories came fast though. The game kept going for weeks. They were both so persistent in being the one to come out victorious that they didn’t even realize how much time had passed. 

One day though. _ One fateful day.  _ One of them ended up winning. 

**_“Now I wake up in the night and watch you breath”_ **

His favorite thing to do was watch her breathe. It reminded him that she was there, that’d she always be around no matter the circumstances. 

It also reminded him that they’d both be okay as long as they were alive and breathing. _ Of course _ , they’d fight, and argue, and things would never be easy between them. But things never had been easy. Getting together didn’t come easily, and convincing themselves they were worth it every time things got hard between them wasn’t simple either. 

But they pined for the not so easy moments. They needed them to keep themselves grounded. If the hard times weren’t there, all of their feelings would be kept shoved down. And then then their love wouldn’t feel the same. It wouldn’t be as comfortable and intimate as it was. 

So when the hard times came, they faced them head on. And it wasn’t like it was for nothing. They were rewarded after every rough patch. After things got argumentative or intense, it would all settle back down. They’d become calm again and then the simplicity would fall back into place. 

The simple times they yearned for just as much as the harder ones. It was like they were addicted to the cycle. The cycle of loudness and yelling, that eventually led right back to tranquility and peace. It was all one big recurring theme for them. 

They were loud, and ridiculous, and extreme.

But they were also simple, and sweet, and quiet. 

It was the thoughtful and effortless moments no one else saw. Just like how nobody else could see them right now. 

They were laying in his RV, it was around 2am, and almost everything was dark except for the tv shining on them. She’d fallen asleep during a movie earlier, and while he tried to focus on the movie playing now, he couldn’t. 

Her breathing had slowed down and became even as she drifted off into a deep slumber and suddenly all of his focus was on her. 

They were laying face to face and he was mesmerized with the sight in front of him. Her hair was in loose curls, framing her face perfectly. Her lips were parted slightly as she breathed. And her eyelashes rested against her cheeks softly. She looked content, completely at peace. 

The only time she moved was when she would flinch ever so slightly, her eyebrows furrowing as she tensed up for a second, like she was in a dream. 

He tried to take a picture of her in his mind. Wanting to be able to think back to what she looked like at this moment. She looked gorgeous all the time, but something about her being so serene and still as she slept just made her all the more stunning. 

He never worked well with his emotions. He always felt them, but putting what he felt into words was something he wasn’t good at. His main way of expressing how he felt was acting, but that was always with a set script. Saying out loud what he felt in every moment wasn’t his strong spot. 

But looking at her as she slept made him feel like he could express himself any way he wanted. She was such an alluring sight that it made him want to proclaim his feelings in ways he hadn’t before. 

Looking at her made him want to write poetry about what a vision she was. He’d compare her to the stars, the sun, the moonlight, all of it. He’d never been one with words, but watching her sleep so restfully made him believe that he could convey everything he felt just by writing it down. 

**_“Kiss me once cause I know you had a long night”_ **

Almost all of her nights were to be considered long nights. Most of them were spent arguing with her dad before finally becoming too exhausted to continue.

By the time the yelling stopped, it was too late to call him for support. At least that’s what she thought. He insisted that she could call him at any time, all that mattered was him being there for her. 

But she knew better than that. She didn't want to bother him with every problem in her life. Of course he’d always be her main support system,  _ he was her boyfriend after all. _ But something about calling him every time anything went wrong in her life made her uneasy. He didn’t need to be her problem solver, she could handle herself.

She was raised to take care of herself, her parents were never there, and she learned over time that they never needed to be. She practically raised her two siblings after her parents divorce, it didn’t take long for her to understand that the only person she could really rely on was herself. Up until she met him, she would only rely on herself. 

But then he came in, and he persisted that she could hand over some of her baggage to him. He told her numerous times that her problems were his problems too, they carried the weight of every situation together. 

His persistence made her feel loved and protected, but she still felt guilty. Most of the times she felt at her lowest were the late hours of the night, hours after he’d already gone to sleep. She didn’t want to bother him then, he deserved rest not being disturbed by her issues.  _ Why wake him up with something she could just tell him about the next morning?  _

That was routine for them. She’d have a long night, not bother him about it right then, get into his car as he picked her up for school the next day, and that’s when she’d tell him everything. 

And he was a good listener.  _ He always had been. _ He never interrupted, just placed a hand on her thigh as he nodded along to whatever she was ranting about. 

This particular morning was proving to be especially difficult. She’d been in a fight with her dad for hours the night before, and when him and his new wife decided they wanted to go out drinking, Jade was left in charge of getting her siblings ready for school the next morning. She’d successfully gotten them dressed and fed before sending them to the bus stop, minutes before Beck arrived to get her. 

She got into his car with a frown, sighing and closing her eyes as he handed her a coffee. 

“Long night, huh?” he asked, giving her a sincere smile. 

“You have no idea” she grunted, resting her head against the window. 

“What happened?”

“Dad and I argued over something stupid. Then him and Tiffany decided they couldn’t handle my supposed ‘attitude’ and went out drinking. Only for them to be too hungover to get Jeremy and Juliette ready this morning, leaving it up to me. I had to get two seven year olds dressed, fed, and at the bus stop before 8am. _ I’m exhausted _ ” she finished tiredly, not looking at him as she kept her head rested against the car window. 

He sighed deeply, giving her a small smile, before turning on his turn signal. 

“What are you doing, we keep going straight if we want to get to school” her eyes opened as she heard him hit the turn signal, watching as he turned the corner that led back to where they came from. 

“Beck, I’m serious, what are you doing?”

“Taking you back to my place so you can sleep. You need a break. We can skip school today” he said with a shrug, looking out of the corner of his eye to see her look of confusion. 

“Are you sure?” she asked unsurely. She was more than happy to get more sleep, _ she certainly needed it, _ but he wasn’t usually like this. Going to school was important to him, and blowing it off just so she could sleep more wasn’t something he usually did.

“Course I’m sure” he said nonchalantly, patting his hand against her thigh a few times as his eyes stayed focused on the road. 

“Just go to sleep” he turned his head so they were making eye contact, giving her a pertinacious look. 

She nodded exhaustingly at his request, turning up the radio slightly before laying her head against the window again. The last thing she felt before drifting off to sleep was his hand reaching for hers, interlocking their fingers tightly. 

When she woke up, they were back at his place. He was turning the car off, watching as she slowly opened her eyes. 

She twisted in discomfort and rubbed her eyes, watching him smirk before getting out of the car. 

He went over to her side of the car, pulling open the door before taking one of her hands within his again. He helped her out of the car gently, wrapping one hand around her waist as he led them to the door of the rv. 

As he got the rv’s door open, he let her go inside first. She immediately collapsed onto his bed, rolling over so she was laying on her stomach. 

He smirked as she did so, moving so he could make another pot of coffee for when she woke up again. 

She gazed at him with half open eyes, biting her lip as he moved around the rv. He looked over his shoulder to find her staring, laughing to himself before going over to the bed. He laid down next to her so they were face to face.

“Hi” he whispered.

“I don’t feel good” was her immediate response, her face scrunching up in discomfort again. 

“Of course you don’t feel good, you’re running on barely any sleep” he nudged his nose against hers, getting several blinks of tiredness in return. 

“Just go back to sleep babe” he mumbled, making sure the last thing she felt before falling into a heavy slumber was him pressing a swift kiss to her lips. 

**_“Kiss me twice because it’s gonna be alright”_ **

The first time he can remember experiencing serious fear was this moment. He’d been at school when it all hit him at once. 

She’d texted him earlier that morning, saying she didn’t feel well enough to come into school. She’d been feeling off the past couple of days, but they both figured it was just a common sickness, and she’d be over it in no time.

She wasn’t one to get sick easily, but when she did, _ it hit her hard.  _ That's why slight concern rested inside him hearing her say she wasn’t going to school that day. 

He offered to skip and come see her, but she stopped him. She insisted she’d be fine by the next day and it wasn’t necessary for him to come over.

He made sure to get hourly text updates from her, but at one point they stopped coming in. He was slightly worried at this. It wasn’t like her to just stop texting him without warning, but he figured she just fell asleep. 

He went about going to his next few classes before he was called into the office during lunch. The guidance counselor insisted he had an important phone call to take. He was a bit confused on why he was being called by the school office phone and not his cellphone, but he took the phone from the office lady anyways, pressing it up to his ear. 

He didn’t know who he was expecting to be calling him, maybe it could’ve been his parents. But he certainly wasn’t ready for it to be Jade’s mom on the other line. 

When he heard her voice, he immediately knew something was wrong. He could almost feel it in him that something had happened to Jade. 

“Hey Beck” her mom sighed into the phone, the exhaustion and nerves noticeable in her voice. 

“Hey Valerie, is everything okay?” Beck asked quickly, wanting to know what was serious enough to lead her into calling him at school.

When he heard her sigh into the phone again, he felt himself start to panic more. The thoughts in his head built up faster and his worry grew. He thought over everything that could've happened. He knew it was serious. If it wasn’t serious, it would’ve been Jade calling him, not her mom. And it would've been on his regular cell phone, not the school office phone. 

“It’s Jade” Valerie told him stoically, not knowing how to explain the situation without causing him to have more anxiety. 

He froze when his fear of something happening to Jade was confirmed. He didn’t know the extent of the situation yet, but it felt like he was collapsing into an inevitable hysteria. 

“What happened?” he could almost feel the fear coming out of him as he asked, his voice lowering to a distressed tone. 

“Her appendix ruptured this morning, she’s in surgery right now, the doctors say she’ll be fine. We’re at the Goodson Hospital on Front street, but don’t panic Beck, they say she’ll be fine and she’ll be out of surgery in a few hours-”

“I’ll be there in ten minutes” he cut her off determinedly, hanging up the phone as the guilt began to escalate inside him. 

_ He knew she was sick. He _ knew she didn’t feel well. And he didn’t check up on her. He didn’t look after her like he was supposed to, and now she was in the hospital,  _ in surgery. _

He moved out of the office hastily, trying to block all of the intruding thoughts from his head, but they were piling up. 

Most of them were about how much he sucked as a boyfriend. He knew she felt awful, and when she stopped answering his texts, he should’ve taken it as a warning sign, but instead he ignored it. He assumed she was fine the entire morning, assumed she was getting much needed rest, but instead she’d been in the hospital. 

And she’d gone into surgery without him by her side. That was what sucked the most. The fact that she’d probably felt alone as she went into that surgery, when in reality, she should've had him there with her. 

She hated hospitals, he knew that. They were one of the things she hated the most, ruling out ducks and rainbows, hospitals were definitely at the top of her list. 

So the fact that she went into one without his support hurt his heart. Like he’d just been hit with everlasting culpability and grief. 

As he drove to the hospital, staying calm was his main goal. He needed to stay calm for her. He had no idea if she was alright, but getting into a car accident before making sure she was okay wouldn’t help their situation at all. 

So he did his best at driving slowly, making sure he was careful and safe. He tried focusing on the road best he could, but it was difficult. His mind kept wandering back to her and how he didn’t know if she’d be okay after this. 

_ Because yes _ , people’s appendix ruptured all the time and getting surgery to fix it wasn’t complicated, but there was always a possibility. 

A possibility that something could go wrong and she wouldn’t end up being okay. There was always that chance. 

He tried not to think about that, he’d get into a car accident if he kept that thought in his mind for too long. 

Pulling into the hospital parking lot, he kept a mantra replaying in his head that’d she be okay. 

The repeating phrase wasn’t something he was certain of, but it did help keep him calm as he entered the hospital lobby. 

He went up to the front desk, ready to ask about Jade, but before he could, a voice intervened. 

It was Valerie. She stood up from her chair in the waiting area and called his name. He looked over his shoulder to see her standing there, and she looked relatively different than any other time he’d seen her. 

She had bags under her eyes, her hair was ruffled and messed up, and frankly, she looked downright exhausted. But she was still in her work clothes and that caused another spark of panic in him. 

If she was in her work clothes, that meant she came to the hospital straight from her job. That also meant that Jade had been alone when this happened. She was at her moms, so her dad and step mom weren’t around, and the twins were at school. 

_ She’d been alone. _

__ He had no idea how she’d even gotten to the hospital if she was alone, maybe she called an ambulance, _ another thing she hated,  _ but he wasn’t positive. All he knew was that his girl had been alone when this striking amount of pain hit her, and he was to blame for it. 

He practically speed walked to where Valerie was standing, asking  _ “is she okay?” _ as quickly as he could get the words out. 

Valerie, who could practically feel the fear coming off of him, rested a hand on his arm reassuringly. 

“ _ She’ll be fine. _ They said she’s going to be in surgery for another hour, but it’s a simple procedure. There shouldn’t be any complications and we’ll be able to see her soon.”

Beck, whose head was still pounding with nerves, nodded slowly at what she said.

He watched her slowly sit back down in the seat she’d previously been in. He blinked slowly, taking in the fact that he knew Jade would be fine before allowing himself to sit in the seat next to Valerie’s.

He pulled open his phone so he could send a quick text to Cat, letting her know what happened. He knew she’d be worried, especially since he’d left school without telling anyone. He’d told her Jade wasn’t feeling well earlier that morning, and even though she wasn’t the brightest, he knew she’d recognize how they’d both been absent. He didn’t want her worrying over both of them not being there, so he explained in his text what had gone down, but also made sure to say how Jade would be fine. 

Writing down how she would be okay in a text seemed to put his mind at ease,  _ at least a little bit. _ And before he even realized, the rest of the hour had gone by. 

A doctor approached him and Valerie, explaining how the surgery was successful and how Jade had been put into the recovery unit. He told them her room number, insisting it was okay to see her, before leaving them to it. 

Valerie told him how she needed to go fill out some paperwork quickly. Instructing him to use her absence as time for him and Jade to be alone. He nodded gratefully at her request before going down the recovery units halls. 

He finally reached her room, _ number 143, _ but before he went inside, he stopped himself. He knew she’d probably be exhausted and drained, and he was prepared to see her that way. But he also was prepared for guilt to hit him in the chest again at the sight of her. 

He took a deep breath as he pushed open the hospital door. Her head immediately snapping away from the window she was looking out of, eyes locking with his. 

“Hey” she smiled at the sight of him, her voice hoarse and scratchy but still matching her usual sound. 

He didn’t move from the door as he looked over the sight in front of him.

Her hair was pulled into a loose ponytail resting over her shoulder, she was in a blue hospital gown that vaguely matched her eyes and her hands were placed in her lap. She was sitting up in the hospital bed, but that didn’t stop her from looking entirely worn out. 

She looked exhausted,  _ she was exhausted _ , and her form showed that. Her skin was more pale than usual and her eyes demonstrated tiredness like he hadn’t seen before. Just as he expected, the guilt hit him hard. Watching her shift in the hospital bed uneasily made him hate himself. Because if she was in this much discomfort after the surgery, he can’t even imagine how much pain she’d been in before. 

“Beck?” she asked again, her tone of voice going from gratefulness to confusion and uncertainty. 

He snapped out of his thoughts at the sound of her voice traveling through the room. He gave her a smile that looked like he was going to cry before moving over to her. 

He grabbed a chair and placed it next to the hospital bed. She smiled softly as he sat down, him instantly resting a hand against her cheek before bringing her into a deep kiss. 

She smiled against his mouth as she felt the physical longing he had to see her. He couldn’t help but smile back against her lips, leaning back from the kiss slightly so he could look over her face, before falling back into it a few seconds later. 

They carried on for a few more minutes before he finally broke it, pulling back so he could look into her eyes before whispering,  _ “oh god, you’re okay.” _

She rolled her eyes teasingly at him, setting her forehead against his before whispering back, “yeah I’m okay.”

“I’m so sorry” he looked into her eyes with sincerity, his hold on her cheek and hand getting tighter. Like she’d disappear before him if he didn’t hold on as tight. 

“Why are you sorry?”

“Cause I really suck as your boyfriend right now. I should've come seen you, or at least done more to make sure you were okay.”

“Beck, don’t be ridiculous. You didn’t know this was happening to me.  _ Hell, I didn’t even know. _ You can’t blame yourself for not knowing what was going on” she told him reassuringly, a strong determination in her voice, “besides, I’m okay now.”

“I know, I just wish I-”

“Beck, stop overreacting. I’m fine, I promise.”

He looked down at their interlocked hands sheepishly, “I just wish I’d been here sooner-”

She cut him for a second time at that. Her lips falling onto his to get him to stop spiraling into guilt and self-hatred. She smirked against his mouth as he kissed her back right away, stopping himself from voicing his concerns again. 

Just like the first kiss, this one carried on for several minutes. When they both finally pulled away for air, she kept her mouth near his. She grinned against his mouth, her voice almost coming out as a whisper with a hint of laughter. 

_ “Were you really that scared?” _

_ “You have always been the braver one babe.” _

**_“Three times cause I’ve waited my whole life”_ **

They’ve both waited their entire lives for a love like this. It’s something they’d been craving since they were barely kids. But her desire and need for love like this was more forceful, a greater ignition kept within her. 

She wanted a strong and impactful love because she’d never seen it with her parents. She doesn’t think they’d ever been in love. Not when they first got married, not when they had her, not when they had the twins when she was 9, and not when they got divorced when she was 10. 

She’d never seen love in her household, instead she saw _ hatred _ , and yelling, and arguing. Her parents never cared that their arguments could influence Jade, it never stopped them. 

Her perception of love was that it didn’t exist, and if people tried to get you to believe it existed, they were lying.  _ Love was fake.  _

It was something she always believed growing up, that love wasn’t a real thing she’d ever experience. She wouldn’t ever feel love, much less fall in love with a person. 

But there was always a small part of her that wanted to prove her own mind wrong. A tiny bit of her wanted to show herself and her parents that she could fall in love with somebody. That she could be loved.

It was a desire of hers. She wanted it. _ She wanted it so badly.  _

She just wanted to live in the perfect fairytale of love that she never saw growing up. She wanted it since she was a little girl. It became a burning aspiration she had for life. 

And the love she ended up experiencing was not when she imagined. Their love wasn’t perfect or a fairytale. But it was still love nonetheless. A more fiery, passionate love, burning inside them every day.

And she’d rather have this type of love with him over any fairytale. Because this love was exciting, and new.  _ Something just for them.  _

And there’d be times where she’d doubt their love. Where her mind would fall back into the routine of doubting situations around her. She’d have seconds of jealousy and insecurity that she'd take out on him. She never meant to, but with the way she’d grown up, it was inevitable for her to question the integrity of some moments. 

But he recognized that. He recognized the insecurity and impending fear, but he never judged her for it.  _ He understood it instead _ . He realized she lived her life afraid of moments slipping away from her grasp. _ Like they’d disappear before her without her realizing.  _

And although the way she clung onto him in fear that he’d leave her broke his heart, it also gave him newfound duty. He made it his job to get her to understand that he wasn’t going anywhere, not like the other people in her life.

So he came up with a way to prove how serious he was about them to her. It’d been one night after she broke down in front of him, something he wasn’t expecting at all. He couldn’t even remember what had happened, something with her dad most likely. But that night was the night everything poured out of her. The night where everything she was holding in finally seeped through the cracks and she let it all out. 

Something snapped in him at that moment, like a switch inside of him had been turned on. He realized then he needed to be there for her no matter the circumstances. He registered that he was going to be the one that wasn’t going to hurt her like everyone else had.

Being the one to stay by her side wasn't just something he wanted to do. _ He needed to do it.  _ He’d seen her get hurt far too many times, he wasn’t going to be someone to do it to her again. 

So his way of proving to her how much he loved her came about when she told him her favorite number. 

After all the tears and sadness passed, he asked her to tell him something he didn’t know. It was his way of calming her down, getting her to say something. It didn’t matter if it was the most random thing she could think of, as long as she was saying something. 

That night, she told him her favorite number was three. She had no particular reason for it to be three, it just was. 

So he took that number and made it into something that was  _ theirs. _

_ “Three, huh?” he kept one hand resting against her knee, his other brushing hair out of her face.  _

_ She nodded tiredly against him, not wanting to vocalize her thoughts anymore, instead just wanting to refocus on the serenity around them.  _

_ “Okay so three. How about this, every time one of us is scared, or worried, or something’s going wrong, we tell each other. And three can be our thing. Kiss each other three times to prove to that we’re okay. That despite everything going on, we’re still okay.” _

_ “Sounds a little cliché, doesn’t it?” she teased back with a smirk, but nodded at his idea nonetheless. _

And that’s how three became  _ their  _ number. Something they shared.  _ Something entirely theirs.  _

It served as a constant reminder for them. Prompted them to see that despite all of the various issues they both carried, their love was still there, beneath it all. 

And it was a love that would last for eternity, something they’d feel inside no matter where they ended up. And if they were both being truthful with themselves, they knew waiting their entire lives for a love like this was worth it. 

**_“I like shiny things, but I’d marry you with paper rings. Uh-huh that’s right, darling you’re the one I want”_ **

With her notion that love wasn’t a real thing, she also never wanted to get married. 

She believed marriage was what caused love to fail. If she ever believed in love for a second, her hope that it would last went down the drain when the thought of marriage came up. 

She’d seen it happen with her parents. She didn’t know them before they were married, she wasn’t born yet. But she imagined they had to be at least slightly more happy before their wedding. 

Marriage was their downfall, when the love between them ceased to exist. And by the time Jade came around and her childhood unfolded, the love was gone.  _ Gone for good.  _

And Jade refused to let that happen to herself. It was something she decided before Beck even came into the picture. 

If she did end up falling in love one day, she refused to ever get married. Marriage was reckless, a force that was out to destroy them in the same way it destroyed her parents. 

She told Beck that thought the first night they talked, at the party. She explained to him how marriage was something she’d never do, how she believed it did people more harm than good. 

And at the time, she had no idea Beck would be the one she ended falling in love with. She also had no idea that he’d be the one to change all of her preconceived notions on love and marriage. 

It might’ve been because she was totally whipped, and undeniably in love, but if she really thought hard about it, she’d marry him.

Realizing that she’d marry him if he asked was when she knew everything between them was forever. 

Because her dislike of marriage completely disappeared when she was around him, like it had never even been there before. 

She would never do anything huge, big events were never her thing, but she would marry him.

And he knew that, they’d talked about it before. He understood her fear and anxiety over marriage and spending life together, but he also knew she’d consider marrying him. 

If it meant she’d be with him forever, marriage was something she’d definitely do. And he made sure her concerns were laid to rest every time they talked about it. He promised her marriage would not be the thing to destroy them, they’d both make sure of it. Make sure they didn't end up like her parents. 

And they were only seventeen now, so marriage was something they wouldn’t have to worry about for a while. But when the time finally came where they both decided they were ready to be married, they’d do it together. They’d do it even if it was as simple being tied together for life with paper rings. 

**_“I hate accidents, except when we went from friends to this, uh-huh that’s right, darling you’re the one I want”_ **

He ended up being the one winning their cat and mouse game. He was the one that ultimately came out successful and accomplished what he wanted. He got her alone and convinced her to finally talk to him, to finally put her trust into him. 

It was a couple of months after the party, they’d only spoken a couple of times since then and he was getting tired of her dodging him whenever he got close to her. 

The game had been fun at first, it was like a challenge for the both of them. But now that it had been going on for such a long time, they were both getting tired of it. 

He finally decided to take action one morning at school. She was walking to her next class when he grabbed her hand, pulling her towards an empty janitor’s closet. 

“What the hell are you doing?” she asked as he closed the closet door, eyes narrowing as she tried her best to look angry. 

“You’re avoiding me, you’ve been avoiding me for months now.”

“So your solution is to pull me into a closet?” she asked back harshly, looking over his shoulder to see out the closet door. 

“I’m going to be late to class” she tried to move around him, placing a hand on the door handle before he put his hand on top of hers. 

“Screw class, can we talk please?” he took her hand in his own, moving them both off of the door knob. 

She looked down at his hand holding hers and stopped herself from smiling, remembering that she couldn’t allow herself to fall. 

She took a deep breath, closing her eyes for a second before looking at him again, “fine, what are we going to talk about?”

“We have to talk about why you’ve been avoiding me since the night of the party. And you can’t say you don’t remember the party, because I know you do.  _ I can tell. _ We both remember what happened between us.” He gave her an honest look, not letting go of her hand. 

She bit her cheek and looked away from his eyes for a second, trying to decide what her options were. 

She could push him out of her way and go to class, ignoring the situation just like she had been. Or she could actually put some trust into him, stay and hear him out, at least for a little while. 

She knew the second option could result in broken trust and tears, but it was what she was leaning towards. 

She wanted to trust him, she felt like she could. She trusted him that first night and the only reason she avoided him now was because her mind over complicated things for her.

Her mind was saying to stay away from him. 

But her heart said that she should do what she wanted, not live in fear of broken promises and heartbreak. So for the first time in a while, she listened to her heart. 

“Okay, fine. Say what you want” she leaned so her back was against the closet wall, crossing her arms in front of her chest as if it was a way to protect herself. 

“Okay, why do you try to stay away from me? Did I do something or-”

“No Beck, you didn’t do anything” she cut him off before he could keep going, “It’s my fault.”

“What do you mean?-”

“I’m just afraid. Afraid of getting close to you. I thought us getting close meant that you would have the power to hurt me if you wanted to. I’m not made to be close with people, I’m supposed to be off on my own. And even though I really like you and I want to be with you, I figured staying away from you was my best option. I thought you’d eventually just give up and leave me alone and-”

That time he was the one to cut her off. Her hands were moving as she explained everything, so to get her to stop, he grabbed her wrists. She flinched at him holding her, but before she could protest, his lips were on hers. 

Her eyes immediately shut when she felt him kissing her. She softly sighed into his mouth as his hold on her wrists softened. His hands instead drifted down to grasp her waist while her hands went up to his head, running her fingers through his hair. 

They could hear the final bell ring as they kept kissing, not caring that they were missing fifth period. He pulled away first, softly letting go her waist as he rested his forehead against hers. 

“We don’t have to rush’ he mumbled. “We can take our time and figure out what we are. I can prove to you that you can trust me and from there we can figure out what we want to be.”

She nodded her head against his, still trying to catch her breath from the kiss. “I think we should start off as friends, not hurry into a relationship. We both need time to trust each other, make sure we’re both what we really want.”

In truth, he didn’t have the same idea she had. He knew from the second he met her that she was who he wanted to be with. But her idea was what made her comfortable, and that’s all that really mattered. He could handle being her friend and getting to know her better if it meant,  _ eventually _ , they’d be together. 

“Okay “ he nodded, watching as she sighed in relief. They both pulled back and he opened the door for her, letting her exit first. He followed her out and before she could leave down the hall, he grabbed onto her elbow. 

“Want to skip fifth and sixth period?” he asked, unsure of what her answer would be. 

She looked down, biting her lip as she thought over his offer before nodding back at him. 

They ended up walking down to a small coffee shop a few blocks away, neither of them minding that they ended up skipping the rest of their classes. They originally intended to skip only two periods, but before they even realized it, hours had passed. Both of them being too distracted to even notice how much time had gone by, they were entirely wrapped up in each other. 

And they realized how strangers probably thought they were a thing as they passed them in the shop. They were sitting like a couple after all. They were next to each other in the booth, fingers interlocked as they whispered back and forth.

But the reality was that they didn't end up officially dating until a few weeks after that day. And them being considered a couple was completely accidental. 

Their peers at school were shocked by their newly developed friendship, but adapted to it quickly. It even brought their friend group together. He ended up spending their lunchtime with her and Cat more frequently, and while Andre and Robbie were confused, they ended up joining the group. From there, their little friend group was formed. 

Robbie, Andre and Cat were the first ones to question if they were together. They would watch them at lunch, promptly noticing how suspiciously close Beck and Jade would always be. 

The three friends knew better than to ask them about their relationship status though. They realized it was a private thing, something only they could understand. So Cat, Robbie, and Andre never crossed that line, they respected their privacy and boundaries. 

The other kids at school were a different story though. 

They had their suspicions on Beck and Jade the second they found out they were friends. They found the dynamic strange, the two of them were complete opposites and out of nowhere, they were suddenly attached at the hip. 

Everyone’s immediate thought was that they were together, just not telling anyone. Which wasn’t entirely off if you thought about it, they did act like a couple ninety percent of the time, usually always with each other. And when they were with other people, it was like they were still alone. They’d whisper to each other, not engaging in whatever conversation everyone else was having. 

And if you asked either of them what they were to each other, they’d be at a loss for words. Because  _ yes,  _ they were friends. But at the same time, it felt like it was more than that. Like their relationship went further than just friendship. 

So the school began to make up guesses,  _ rumors about them _ . And the rumors grew to the point where you couldn’t recognize the gossip from the legitimate truth. 

Beck and Jade couldn’t even recall when they officially started dating. It just came out of nowhere, like they had suddenly begun to believe the relationship rumors just like the rest of the school. 

And at some point, everyone just accepted that they were together. It wasn’t unnatural or odd for the school to see. It felt normal, like they’d always been that way. Nobody questioned or argued it.

They just let Beck and Jade be Beck and Jade.

**_“In paper rings, in picture frames, and dirty dreams, oh you’re the one I want”_ **

Before they got together, neither of them were big on the idea of having picture frames hung up around their rooms. 

Beck’s room in his parent’s house had a few put up on the walls and on his desk, mostly of him and childhood friends or family members. But his rv was evidently absent of pictures.  _ Till he got together with Jade.  _

Her room was the same way his was. There were only a few pictures hung up here and there. Most of them were of her and Cat, or a few of her and the twins, but that was it.  _ Till she got together with Beck.  _

Them getting together changed both of their views on picture frames. Now they loved them, they loved having pictures placed around their rooms of each other. 

Her favorites were film camera pictures she’d taken of them. If Jade was around, chances were, a film camera was with her. 

She loved taking pictures on film and having them be developed, but her absolute favorites were the ones of them. 

She had their pictures displayed around her room. So everyone who went into her room knew about them, understood that they were together. Pictures to her were a way to get others to understand the intensity and seriousness of their relationship. 

His favorites were the ones that were just single pictures of her. Preferably ones he’d taken himself. He liked having a way to always see her, even if she wasn't around. 

She was his favorite thing to look at, a vision for his eyes. So he figured why not have pictures of her spread out around the rv?

None of them were too extreme, just simple photo frames of pictures he’d taken over the years. Most of them were times he’d gotten her to smile and he was able to capture a picture. But some were ones of her not paying attention at all, face shoved into a book. Another favorite of his was one where she was scowling at him, her eyes narrowed in annoyance, the corners of her mouth slightly turning up though, like she was just about to smile at him. 

They both looked at their pictures whenever things went wrong. Whenever a fight got too out of hand or their arguing never seemed to stop, they’d look at their pictures. They reminded them of the good times. Times where they were both so happy and in love they’d forgotten about all of the problems. Those pictures were what inspired them to keep going, to keep being in love with each other, even when circumstances were strenuous. 

**_“In the winter, in the icy outdoor pool, when you jumped in first, I went in too, I’m with you even if it makes me blue”_ **

Just the mention of the color blue brought them both back to this moment. It was a day they could both remember every second of. One they had no trouble recalling. 

It was Cat’s sixteenth birthday. She didn’t want a huge party or anything loud and great, just a small get together with her friends. 

Jade offered to have them all over at her house. Her dad and step mom would be out of town for some convention and the twins would be at her moms, meaning she had the house to herself for the weekend. 

She’d been planning to have Beck stay over for the entirety of it, but when Cat mentioned not knowing what to do for her birthday, Jade suggested they all come over. 

None of them really knew what they were planning on doing, they’d probably end up eating ridiculous amounts of pizza and getting drunk. But it was the middle of January and mid terms were happening, so all of them were honestly fine doing anything to take their minds off that. 

What they weren’t expecting was for them to eventually wander outside, staring at the pool in the backyard. It was covered up for the winter, even with the Los Angeles' heat that was present throughout the year, it was still too cold to swim. 

None of them were really paying attention when Andre pulled the pool cover off. They were just about to go back inside the house when they heard a loud splash sound out behind them.

They flinched abruptly, Beck letting the screen door slam shut again as they all turned around to see what happened. 

“Andre, what the hell!” Jade shouted, seeing Andre in the pool, fully dressed, grinning like what he just did was no big deal. He’d always been the spontaneous one of their group, open to doing anything in the moment, but this was taking it to another level. 

The rest of them were biting back laughs as Jade scowled at him, Cat being the first one to walk back over to the pool.

“Are you okay?” she asked him, leaning down so she was right on the edge of the pool. She hadn’t realized he jumped into the pool intentionally and assumed he fell in, _ a mistake on her part. _ He took her reaching her hand out as his chance, coming towards her slowly. 

He took hold of her hand, pulling her into the pool with him before she could protest. She let out a shriek as she felt the cold water hit her. Coming up from beneath the water, she gave him an offended glare, moving her soaked hair away from her face. 

“Andre!” she shrieked, trying her best to be mad at him, but failing as she watched him burst out into laughter. She laughed back, splashing him quickly before he got out of the water. 

She gave him a confused stare, but began giggling again as he pushed Tori into the pool and jumped in behind her. She shrieked at him the same way Cat had, but didn’t stay mad for long, instead taking the opportunity to shove him underwater.

Cat called for the rest of them to jump in too, insisting the cold water wasn’t a big deal. Trina and Robbie gave each other unsure glances before shrugging, jumping in at the same time. 

They all laughed ridiculously as they floated in the water, their clothes would be soaked the rest of the day and they were all freezing cold, but none of them really cared. 

They kept splashing each other while hysterically laughing, looking up to see Jade and Beck were the only ones not in the pool,  _ yet.  _

Jade looked down at them with a scowl of annoyance, her arms crossed over her chest as she grimaced at their antics. 

Beck stood behind her, making eye contact with the group quickly. He put a finger over his lips to signal them to be quiet before he moved closer to Jade. 

She hadn’t even processed what was happening before she felt his arms go around her waist, picking her up swiftly. He moved them closer to the pool and she screamed.

“Beck! Beck no! I swear to god-”

Her words were cut off by the water, feeling them both land in the pool roughly. She came up immediately, pushing hair out of her face as she glared at him. He gave her a mischievous smile, bringing his hands up to her cheeks so he could wipe away some of her dripping mascara. 

_ “I hate you”  _ she glared at him again, shoving his face away from hers as he laughed. 

He came right back though, bringing his face up against hers again, whispering a quick,  _ “no you don’t”,  _ before kissing her. 

And even though she wanted to be annoyed at him for causing them to both land in the freezing cold pool while fully dressed,  _ she couldn’t.  _

So she grinned as the kiss continued, feeling him grin right back. Her arms went around his neck while his went down to her waist, grabbing a hold of it tightly.

Their friends groaned behind them as the kiss got more heated, splashing them in attempts to get them to stop. They eyed their friends teasingly, breaking the kiss so they could splash them back.

And before any of them realized it, hours had passed and they were still in the pool. They were all freezing and felt like they could barely move, but none of them wanted to get out. 

It wasn’t until Robbie brought up the fact that they hadn't had cake yet that they all got out of the pool. Beck ran to get them towels from the pool house, passing them out hurriedly as they all shook coldly. 

He gave Andre the rest of the towels, taking a few for him and Jade. He moved fast as she kept shivering, placing a towel around her shoulders before moving his hands up and down her arms to warm her up. 

She gave him a light smile, barely noticeable as it was covered by her teeth chattering. He looked down at her lips, seeing their slightly blue tint from how long they’d been in the cold. 

He looked around to see their friends still scrambling to warm up. They moved back inside the house in hopes of starting up the fireplace, and before Jade could follow them, Beck pulled her back. 

“What?” she asked, her tone slightly irritated, showing she was ready to be back inside the warmth of the house. 

He gave her a devious smile, whispering, “nothing, I just love you” before closing the gap between their lips. 

“ **_Which takes me back to the color that we painted your brother’s wall”_ **

If you asked them to remember another time where the color blue held deep significance to them, they’d both tell you about the time they had to paint Jade’s little brother’s room. 

Her mom was going out of town for the weekend, leaving Jade in charge of the twins. Her mom allowed Beck to stay over for the weekend too, with the exception that they both promised to paint Jeremy’s room blue while she was gone. 

Jade was dreading the idea of it, wasting a whole day of being with her boyfriend by painting a seven year old’s room. Beck, _ however, _ was excited for it. He thought it’d be a learning experience for them, or at least a chance to see who got the most annoyed fastest. 

After her mom had left that Friday morning, Beck pulled up to the house just an hour later, buckets of paint in hand. 

The twins stood by the door excitedly, bouncing up and down slightly as they watched Beck walk up the driveway. 

Jade stayed in the kitchen, rolling her eyes at her siblings' excitement just from seeing her boyfriend. She leaned against the counter and watched as they shrieked while Beck tried to open the front door without dropping the paint. 

After several tries, he successfully made it inside and set down the paint as the twins jumped to hug him, he laughed as they did, looking up to see Jade biting back a smile at the sight. 

After Juliette hung onto him for longer than expected, he finally set her down and made his way over to Jade, bringing her into a hug. 

She sighed against his shoulder as her arms went around his neck, drawing him in closer.

“Missed you” he mumbled against her hair. 

“You too” she mumbled back, trying her best to keep her tight grip on him.

It was true, they both missed each other,  _ a lot.  _ He’d been in Canada the past two weeks, which they both thought was far too long for him to be away. It was probably the longest they’d been away from each other in a while, but they couldn’t complain now. They had a whole weekend to make up for their time apart. 

He pulled away from the hug before she did, keeping his hands around her waist as he looked down at Jeremy and Juliette 

“Ready to paint?” he asked, earning eager nods from them in return. 

Juliette and Jeremy leaped up at the mention of paint, racing to see who could get up the stairs faster. Beck and Jade stayed in the kitchen for a few more seconds, trying to find paint brushes as they heard shouts from upstairs. 

“Beck! Come on!” they heard both of the twins yell, getting a chuckle from him and an eye roll from Jade. 

“Can’t believe they like my own boyfriend more than me” Jade muttered, pulling out paint brushes from the back of a cabinet. 

“Come on babe, they love you too” Beck laughed, going up to her,  _ “just not as much as they love me”  _ he smirked, getting a smack on the shoulder from her. 

“God, I can’t believe I’m stuck with you three idiots this weekend” she teasingly scowled as she made her way up the stairs, him following behind her with the paint buckets . 

They went into Jeremy’s room, finding the twins already pushing furniture away from the walls so they could paint. Jade and Beck both had to hold back laughs as they watched the small seven year olds attempt at moving furniture, failing miserably. 

“Here let me help” Beck laughed lightly, taking Juliette’s spot as he helped Jeremy move a dresser. 

Jade sat down on the ground, Juliette joining her. They opened up the paint buckets to see a bright neon blue staring back at them. 

Jade’s eyebrows furrowed, looking up from the bucket to give a confused look to Jeremy. 

“Out of all of the shades of blue to choose from, you picked this one?” she asked him, slight disgust present in her voice as she looked back at the neon color in the bucket before locking eyes with Jeremy again.

He gave her a shrug, not paying her any attention, “I like it.”

Beck smiled at the boy's ignorance of Jade’s comment, ruffling his hair while saying “I think it’s cool dude.”

“See, Beck thinks it’s cool” Jeremy stuck his tongue out at his sister, receiving a glare from her. 

_ “Course he does”  _ Jade sighed, looking up at her boyfriend to see him giving her a sheepish smile with a shrug. 

“Are we starting or what?” she turned her eyes back down to the paint, handing them each a paint brush. 

Juliette squealed, grabbing a paintbrush out of her hand first, about to stick it into the paint before Jade took the paintbrush back. 

“Nuh-uh, your hair has to be in a ponytail first” she gestured to Juliette’s hair flowing down her back, “come here, let me put it up.”

Juliette sighed angrily, dropping to the ground before turning to Jade, sitting down so she could let her pull her hair up into a ponytail. 

While Jade did Juliette’s hair, and then her own, Jeremy and Beck started painting. They both took their time, making sure they were painting equal amounts so it didn’t look sloppy. 

When Juliette’s hair was done, Jade handed her a brush and pushed her towards a wall on the opposite side of the room, telling Jeremy to go with her so she could be alone with Beck. 

“ We're seriously spending our Friday doing this” she sighed, standing next to him so they were painting the same wall.

“Could be worse” he shrugged, looking behind him to make sure Jeremy and Juliette were painting the right wall. 

“You’re too optimistic” she smirked, looking at him with a sly smile. 

“I just think there’s ways to make this fun” he shrugged again.

“Oh yeah? Like what-” before she could even finish her sentence, he had turned to face her, wiping his paintbrush against her face. 

Her mouth opened in shock, eyes widening as he bit his lip to stop himself from bursting out into laughter. 

_ “You did not”  _ she gawked at him, noticing Jeremy and Juliette look away from the wall they were painting so they could see what was going on. 

Beck’s laughter couldn’t be held back any longer as he looked at her paint covered face again, his laughter getting louder as he tried to reason, “it matches your eyes”

Her open mouth turned into a smile, grabbing a hold of her own paintbrush. She flicked the brush at him, causing it’s paint to land onto his shirt. 

He gawked at her in the same way she had and that's when it started. They both began tossing paint at each other while laughing hysterically, Jeremy and Juliette watching in confusion. 

They were both drenched in paint and one bucket was entirely gone when they tried to get Jeremy and Juliette to join in. Jeremy and Juliette shared glances of uncertainty, not used to seeing Jade so openly happy. 

They figured she wouldn’t stay this way for long and both agreed to join in on the fun, before it was gone entirely. They knew their sister would get happier every time her boyfriend was around,  _ that was a part of the reason why they loved him so much, _ but they didn’t think they’d ever seen her be this carefree. 

They knew the moment would be gone before they even realized, so they took the time to indulge in it. Allowing Beck and Jade to drench them in paint as the room got messier with each spilling bucket. 

After an hour, all of the paint was gone and barely any of the walls were painted. Most of the paint was covering them, Beck and Jade being covered the most. Their clothes were enveloped entirely in paint, along with their faces and their hair. 

They agreed to clean up to the best of their ability before Beck left to go get more paint,  _ again. _

And even though it took over two hours for Jade to get all of the paint off of the twins, and then several more hours to finish painting the room without getting distracted, it didn’t end up looking bad. 

As they all stood by the door and looked over the room, they were actually proud of the result. The neon blue proved to be a not totally awful color, much to Jade’s dismay and Jeremy’s enjoyment. 

And later that night, when Jeremy and Juliette got settled into bed and begged Beck to tell them a story, Jade stood by the door and put her attention on them. She listened as Beck turned up the dramatics for the ridiculous story he was telling and she couldn’t help the smile that graced her lips. 

**_“Honey without all the exes, fights, and flaws, we wouldn’t be standing here so tall’_ **

Fights could be frequent for them, sometimes they’d happen without them even realizing. Their fights would be overdramatic, complicated, and most of the time just  _ plain stupid _ . But they also brought out a deeper understanding of their relationship. 

The fights would be intense, most of the time resulting in yelling and shouting back and forth, but there was always an end result to them. 

They believed they came out stronger each time, after every fight that persevered, they came out on the other side of it,  _ together.  _

_ And of course, _ it took time for them to calm down and settle back into the peaceful state they’d been in before, but they always did. 

Their fights would be stressful and argumentative, sometimes even feeling like a breaking point for them. But at the same time, they never lasted longer than a day and would usually be forgotten after a couple of hours of settling down. 

_ No _ , they never let things get too heated or extreme, that would be too much for the both of them. It hurt enough just to be fighting in general, let alone adding more stress onto it by letting things get completely out of hand. 

That’s why their arguments were taken seriously. They knew when they argued something had to be seriously wrong. So they faced each argument with integrity and sincerity, because that’s how each problem would end up getting resolved. 

They’d yell at each other, and on rare occasion, someone would end up crying or storming out. But that never stopped them from making up. Whenever somebody stormed out, they’d end up coming right back. 

They would take the needed time to themselves, think over what’d they said and what needed to change, then they’d come back together. 

They would talk over what happened, come to a mutual understanding of what the issue was, and then it’d be over with. It would end as quickly as it started. They’d never been ones for drama, they were not about to let their relationship involve it anymore than they needed it to be. 

Another fragment of their relationship they always focused on making stronger was seeing each other’s flaws. And not just seeing them,  _ accepting them too.  _

They learned over time they couldn’t change each other. _ And they didn’t want to either. _ They might not have always enjoyed certain parts of each other, but those parts were still loved. 

It was what made them different, _ complex.  _ They’d been opposites since the first night they met, getting together wouldn’t change that. And when they both trusted each other not to change, no matter the issue, that’s when they felt their relationship was at its strongest. 

They understood the fights were inescapable, they couldn’t just avoid them like they didn’t exist. But they did understand that they could stop them from happening often, they could be preventable if tried. 

And when a fight did happen to take place, when they were unable to stop it from occurring, they’d go through the motions of it. They’d never take it too fast or too slow, it’d be handled just like it always was. And by the end of it, they’d be stronger people along with having a stronger relationship. 

“ **_I want to drive away with you”_ **

They’d been everywhere together. That was always something they loved doing,  _ going places and seeing new things _ . All one of them had to do was offer and the other would be on board without question. 

Rethinking every place they’d gone together was difficult, it was getting to the point where there were too many road trips to keep track of. 

They’d been almost everywhere in California together. Road tripping there was the easiest, the closest to home. But their favorite trips always ended up being the ones that were further away. 

The ones out of state, usually unplanned, without any end destination. The ones where they’d have lapses of judgment and they’d turn to spontaneity. Those were always the best trips. 

They’d pick each other up in the middle of the night, car lights bright as they drove to wherever they wanted. Usually deciding where they’d go as they were already on the road. 

Whatever cares or worries they had in those moments would disappear as they felt the cold wind go through the car, windows down and music blasting as they drove along the fairly empty roads.    


They’d pull over whenever they felt like it. Stopping whenever one of them thought something was interesting or they wanted to explore. 

They’d wander out of the car aimlessly, not knowing what they wanted to find, but always ready for anything. 

If it was like their trip to Sacramento, they’d discover an underground Mexican restaurant that was a secret from the public. 

Or if it was like the time they went to Seattle, they’d find various 24 hours bookstores and coffee shops. 

Whatever they found, they’d love. Because to them, it didn’t matter if their destination was out of the blue and surprising, long as they were together for it. They could end up in the most unfulfilling spot, and they’d still find a way to make memories out of it. 

Never mattered where they were going, or where they’d end up, as long as they were driving away together, hand in hand. 

**“** **_I want your complications too”_ **

They were both complicated. They longed to survive with certain complexity. They never wanted to be simple or ordinary, that would be too boring for them. 

So instead they were complicated. 

It was a word that fit them best on their own, along with their relationship. 

They had complicated dreams, complicated family lives, complicated friendships, it was no wonder when their relationship ended up being complicated too. 

And everyone thought they were crazy for loving the complicated. They all insisted that they’d be better off not falling into the trap of perplexing hardships. 

But Beck and Jade had never been ones to listen to what others had to say about them. That wasn’t their thing. They liked to do things off on their own without the opinions of others getting in the way. 

That’s why they loved their friends so much, they never tried to get involved.  _ Of course, with the exception of Tori here and there _ . But other than that, their friends minded their own business. 

They never tried sticking their noses into something that didn’t need them in some way. And that’s how Jade and Beck preferred it. 

They preferred doing it on their own, handling things in the way they knew they were both okay with. They took notice of each others’ complications, but they never let said complications defy them. 

They loved the complicated instead, because it reminded them how they learned new things about each other every day, and how they’d never end up being boring. 

Others could call them crazy as much as they wanted, but in the end, they both knew complicated was what made them  _ Beck and Jade.  _ And they felt no need to change something that was such an important part of their relationship. 

_**“I want your dreary Mondays too, wrap your arms around me baby boy”** _

Neither of them were morning people. They didn’t just know that, and their friends didn’t just know that,  _ the whole school knew it.  _

And it was something easily noticeable on Monday mornings. The couple would walk into the school tiredly, barely able to keep their eyes open as the weekend exhaustion hit them. 

Their friends would laugh as they watched them stand at their lockers before they had their coffees.  _ It was certainly a sight to be seen.  _

They would both yawn drearily, trying to stop themselves from closing their eyes in fear that they would fall asleep against their lockers.

He was usually the one to regain his composure before she did. He’d find the energy to wake up and be ready for the day while she would slam her locker closed tiredly. 

She’d take his arm and wrap it around her shoulder, in hopes that it’d be a way of keeping her awake through first period. 

That’s how their schedule always ended up working,  _ unfortunately.  _

They wouldn’t have time to get coffee before their first class, instead having to get it during their free time second period. She dreaded first period for that reason, it was a class she could barely stay awake for. 

The only way she ended up keeping herself awake most times was by having him there. He’d nudged her awake before she dozed off in the middle of class. 

She’d feel the warmth of his arm radiate onto her shoulder and something in her would suddenly wake up. 

It was a struggle to keep her focus on whatever topic their class was doing each morning, especially without a coffee to help, but he was always there for that. 

**_“You’re the one I want, you’re the one I want”_ **

That was always it, _ wasn’t it? _

That’s what it always came down to.

Everything could be going wrong, the whole world could be collapsing for all they cared, and that would still be it. 

The fact that they both wanted each other. 

They didn’t just want each other, _they needed each other,_ the years of being together were there to prove that. 

But being wanted,  _ being needed _ , it always mattered the most.

And they didn’t just want selective parts of each other. They didn’t just want to pick and choose what glimpses of each other they craved. 

_ No, _ they wanted everything about each other. It was burning inside them, the constant need and want to be each other’s everything, amongst it all. 

They wanted every part of each other because _ they knew _ . They knew that combining the parts of each other they wanted the most would result in something entirely them. Something _ so intriguing, yet so strange _ to the rest of the world, it just had to be them. 

They were all of it together.

Every hardship, complication, struggle. It was all them. 

Every moment of love, and passion, and contentment. It was all them. 

Every memory that took up space in their minds was them. 

None of it was ever overlooked or overshadowed by other factors of their lives. They wouldn’t let that happen. They wouldn’t let themselves allow their love to fade in favor of other people’s thoughts. 

What mattered the most was that they were them through it all. 

They didn't need to be anyone else besides themselves. 

They were in love, and they were together, and though it didn’t make sense to the rest of the world, to them it was _ everything.  _

**Author's Note:**

> There it is!! Longer than necessary, but still here. i really hope you enjoyed because writing is has been super fun for me. I have a new idea for something coming up so i should be writing more often! (Let's hope so) Anyways, thank you so much for reading, it obviously means the world to me. And as always leave any thoughts you have, they're greatly appreciated <333


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